My advice given – Don’t panic about your house… what happened to that zen place you were at in your mind. Go there… peace, lake, front porch, rocking chair – forget about it. I think our mind really does affect matter and if you’ve ever been around someone who has eagerly tried to persuade you to do something, and you feel that energy, then you know what I mean. It stops you. Remember that you have done everything you can for that house. You have it listed with an experienced realtor who is still working full time and knows how to sell a property. It’s showing, it’s priced right, and we are in the right selling season… so sit back, get to the peaceful place in your mind, and let God handle it. Your worrying is not going to make it better, and its just going to make you feel worse. I’m thinking that you just have a whole lot on you right now, that you don’t really like, and that it’s probably a safe place to put that energy…but don’t, go to the lake or whatever place in your mind that brings you peace, and think about the life you want. Like how can you create a job that you like… put your energy there, …we can’t keep thinking about stuff we can’t control… focus just on yourself. It sounds easier – since we can control ourselves, its actually not. It’s easier to see it and say it, for someone else. We say, just like I’m doing right now, that all they have to do is this or that, and then things will eventually get better, they will start seeing the results, and yet we don’t do the same for ourselves.
I’m taking my own advice and looking inward at something I can control, but haven’t – my garage. It’s has been haunting me for 10 plus years. I have moved several time and have gotten rid of a lot. I just never fully committed to tackling it all. I would do everything for everybody else before I would get into that garage, and now my time is winding down – I’m moving again, and I know what I need to do. I’m capable of it, and I have time to do it now, but I’m not. I’m exercising more, I’m eating right, I’m writing, but not as much as I want to be, because all of these other things, like my garage – hovering over me. I want to be working on my book, but I keep doing everything else first, or I sit and stare at the walls because of this pressure of these unfinished tasks. If you were telling me about the mess of your garage and your needing to get through it, before your move. I would tell you to get up and just do it, so that your mind would be free to write, exercise, and be happy.
I’m trying not to let myself get pulled in any other direction, but If someone asks me to do something. I jump right up and get it done. I think the key is that we need to learn to care for ourselves, at least as well as we take care of others, and if energy goes where our attention goes, then we will finally get the love and support that we have been wanting. Lets experiment – try it with me. Lets try to really focus on yourselves… and see what happens… Okay, I’m taking my own advise, I’m getting up, changing my clothes and going into the garage.
A Few Hours Later – after taking my own advice, I went outside to work in the garage, since I was lecturing, I felt like I need to do the same in my own life. I opened up the garage and took the trash out, then I looked to my left and saw all the weeds in the flower bed, so I pulled them, then looked at the next flower bed, and I pulled the weeds there as well. Then I was hot and needed a drink and a rest, so I went back inside and filled up a glass of water and sat on my front porch to recuperate;) I didn’t want to get back up and go in the garage, but again, since I was lecturing us…I had to. I came across so much of my past, which slapped me in the face, of all I’ve been trying to forget. I get it, the refusal to get this task accomplished is not all about doing something for myself, but also the refusal to have to feel the pain of it all again – A double wammy.
Today I’m getting ready to go back into the garage after this blog posting, and I’m telling myself that I will be able to put this all behind me once this is done. So with the placement of each item, into trash, keep, or give away piles, I’m one step closer to feeling the freedom and peace of my “just right” life.
Change is hard only in our mind, work on what you can control. If you faulter, or stop for a moment – just start again. If we keep moving forward, eventually we will get there…
Just a thought…
Love, Goldi
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